Manipulating Communication.

Publicated on : 1215822901
Manipulation is all around us in everyday life. By far, everyone can be manipulated in doing something that does not stem form someone's own thoughts. They are influenced thought leading to controlled behavior. Psychology deals with this in a great deal, and has many insights on why people do conform to ideas or thoughts that are not their own. The trick lies in communication, because it is the basic input and output of thoughts. Today, i want to talk about some personal experiences and how I manipulated communication to influence people for fun. In many ways, it is hard to tell what are your own thoughts and what thoughts have been so called primed in you, through either on purpose subliminal messages, messages that are already out there in out every day life, something you read, or even what you heard while communicating with others. What are genuine thoughts? I certainly think that is hard to tell, and i am also willing to say that most of your thoughts are not your own. You have a value -call it morality- or triage system, but even that might not be your own. If personality is being formed, or groomed -depends where you stand- it makes it difficult to be totally autonomous. This can explain 'Sheople' behavior in a great deal, people who never had a single thought emanating from themselves and blindly follow what peers, the media, or parents say. So, why is it that there are people who can escape this, and have genuine thoughts of their own? Well, here also it is hard to say, because everyone is influenced somehow. To me, the difference only lies on being able to have thoughts and think about or examine them. This is one way of escaping monotonous thoughts and create new and genuine ones, that are really your or new thoughts.

Duke, the fuqua school of business, did some interesting research[1] about short exposure to logo's and stated that: Apple really makes you 'Think Different'. Where they did a study on short exposure of brands, and what they found that almost everyone is influenced by short exposure, because it happens so fast, that the brain does not throw up a barrier whereas it would do if the brand is in clear focus for a long period of time. This means that subliminal messages do work, but only if these messages are subliminally primed. So, you can influence people by first priming them, and then exposing them to short unconscious messages to influence them. So, it basically triggers an already present association to a logo unnoticeable. This of course, has great impact on our perception of reality, because how far does these things work on an unconscious level, where we are exposed to millions of snapshots in our daily life, influencing and directing our thoughts. it may not be on purpose, but it can influence human behavior.

Negation.

The problem with the unconscious mind, is that it takes everything in without a clear seeing negation. This is known for many years, and it's impact is huge in many areas. The idea is as follows, let's say for example that I want to write you a letter or e-mail answering you on some subject. The main thing I must not do, is using negative words in the whole letter, because negative words in the syntax -even if well intended- will influence the person who reads it in an unconscious fashion. You probably once hard the phrase: there is no such thing as bad publicity. Well, that is really true form the negation standpoint. Yes, there is more to it. because not all bad publicity is good, but you also can control bad publicity working in your favor, this has to do with manipulating communication. often so ever a shock factor buried in a message can make people uncertain whether the communicated message is either perceived as bad or good.

Manipulating communication.

I have a long interest on how to manipulate communication to influence people. This is a kind of leisure I like to be involved in. But I also like to decipher communication that I get. When I first start doing this, I would save chat transcripts from either real talks or via some online chat program or e-mail communication. Later on, I didn't need to do that anymore, since I could decipher what people really mean and say by just doing the deciphering on the fly. The reason I like doing this is because when you know how it works, you can influence people with it. Sounds, pretty scary, but it's quite harmless. I learned that with slight alteration of how I formulate a sentence or the use of words to bury a hidden message -that is in fact in clear sight- I could influence and control my message interpretation to someone on the other end, and more importantly to trigger the right response, usually that involved getting compliance on ideas, or make them feel differently about me.

Opening communication.

Another interesting thing I noticed when communicating, is how people start a message or conversation. And there is a lot to be deducted from that. Basically I believe that you can read people's real intention from which words they use to start a conversation alone. Sounds interesting? let's see. It is tricky, but I think it can be done. For instance, try to notice the first word they communicate. usually this word is very important, but for many it goes unnoticed. This opening word can be on itself, but can also precede your name, or something else. I made a list of opening words with my personal interpretation of it, here is a short list of such subtleties I notice time after time:

Hi Ronald. 
 


 

Normal, use of a single period.

Hi! or Hi Ronald!
 


 

Affirmative and appreciative due to exclamation mark, either happy or overwhelmingly interested.

Hi Ronald...
 


 

This one is dangerous, because usually this person is either lying or wants to persuade 
 

you. It often never happens on the start, if you see sentences with 2 or more periods, 
 

you better watch out for those. Periods are used to create a silence or an echo 
 

representing uncertainty, and this is definitely something to watch out for.

Hey Ronald.
 


 

Notice the 'y' this y is very important, because the tail of the 'y' is leaning left, 
 

capsulizing the 'He'. usually this means that someone is held back, 
 

and does either not really want to talk to you, or reacts restrictive.

Hey Ronald...
 


 

This is the worst of all, because it combined the leaning 'y' as well as the uncertain periods. 
 

This one rarely happens in this situation, but can be used in other forms when someone constructs
 

a message.

Hey Ronald!
 


 

This is mixed signal, in my interpretation it really says: I contacted you because I 
 

must, not because I want. Due to the exclamation mark and the tailed leaning 'y' 
 

capsulizing the opening.

The use of multiple periods is perhaps the most important in sentences. For example, lets suggest that I am the boss of a company and I noticed that 2 pencils are stolen. So, I e-mail all my employees and notify them of the theft. Assume I get this response:

Oh. I saw those pencils yesterday on your desk!

Oh.. I saw those pencils yesterday on your desk...

Not in all cases, but usually the later sentence implies silence through the use of periods. You really have to watch out for such communication, because it can be tell-tale signs to be more vigilant in your communication. try to look for sentences inside a message that carry 2 or more periods, and judge on that. I would be happy to hear your ideas on that.

Sentence manipulation.

Let's say I write:

Hi John. was nice talking to you yesterday, 
 

I want to let you know that I do not have no idea what you talked about.

Granted that it is a double denial of having no idea, it's interestingly perceived as having no clue at all.

I could also write:

Hi John. was nice talking to you yesterday, 
 

I want to let you know that I do not have no idea what you talked about.
 

So it will be fine soon John!

Now, interestingly enough, the last phrase will be the best remembered since they read it as the last message and is in clear consciousness. not only in this message but in general this almost always worked for me. If I wanted something to be done, I made sure I created a phrase at the end of the message. Usually, people will answer the last message first in communication. It's easy to notice this when two people are debating. If you watch closely, and one debater talks for let's say 5 minutes asking 3 questions, the last question gets the most attention by the other debater, and often it's answered first. When being answered, it is common for the debater to order his thoughts and moving away from the question or let it dissolve in his train of thoughts that sparks other ideas or even another question. I've listened carefully to many debates, and I always find this pattern back somewhere in the debate, where one debater actually manipulates the debate or steer it into another direction so that they end up agreeing with each other. It also means that you can solve conflicts or conflicts starting to happen in communication by turning away from the subject slowly, or going deeper on the actual meaning and suggest other ideas by burring them into a conversation or message. You might have doubts about this, if you do, I ask you politely to try to notice these patterns.

Rapport.

Yes, you'll also have to make use of 'rapport' often if you want to manipulate communication, but this requires care. Rapport is basically mirroring the way people communicate so that they start to relate to you, usually such decision is made unconsciously by the person that is persuaded into the manipulation, or rapport can also happen unconsciously from both sides. But you also can detect it if you watch closely for such signs, you can read minds through body language, and if you pay close attention you will see it happening all around you. I had some success with these techniques several times, and I even convinced many people into choosing me as the right person while being interviewed, or when selling myself, or as a potential partner! I did that many times before I got bored of it.

Conclusion.

Manipulating communication to influence thoughts and behavior can be found anywhere, and it works. The trick of successful manipulation is repetition and controlling the whole communication. If you drop at some point, it is very hard to persuade someone back into it. It can be done, but it requires real mastery and self-control. Simply put, manipulation of communication can get you what you want, and effectively. I hope you enjoyed the article, and hopefully sparked some interest in these kinds of phenomena.

[1] http://youtube.com/watch?v=3iJWyiaXLLw